Should We Stay or Should We Go🎶🎶🎶

Okay.  So, I know it’s been a day or two since my last post 😉 and I wasn’t actually planning a post today ‘cuz it’s crazy busy for us right now, but…who the hell could resist?

Not I.

You all know how much I like a good ‘saga’  😂 😭 😓

Especially about cars.  Or moving.  Or houses.  Or other Shit-N-Stuff.

Right?

So…after all the blood, sweat, and tears, we shed before, during, and after, moving into our current home, we are considering selling.

Yup…2 years, 6 months in, picking up and moving again is actually being considered.

Nutz! 😵   Looney!  😱   Coocoo for Cocoa Puffs! 🐒

Why?

Two reasons really.

The first, to be closer to my recently transplanted Mom, who is, apparently, one of those lucky people I’ve heard about when it comes to adventures in moving.  Her pack and move went smoothly.  Her house behaved when she moved in and didn’t reach out and break her leg or rain down through her light fixtures from the floor above.

IMG_0004

Remember my crying lights?

She has made a beautiful home for herself…and is quite content to remain where she is.  But, we are finding that even a mere 20 minute/10 mile distance, is 15 minutes too far!

{Hmmm, note to self…A Drive Too Far…Book?  Movie?  Copyright infringement?  Carry on self…}

The second, as important as the first, is because our beautiful Ms. Sadie needs a place to safely run and play in her own backyard, and we cannot give that to her.

Why?

Because we cannot fence it in 😲

Why?

Bureaucratic Bullshit 🚧

We have a gorgeous back yard…

Northfield in the fall

What…don’t believe that’s mine?

What—everrrrrrrrrrrr  👀

Forget the mountains then.

Oh for Pete’s sake…take out the barn if it bothers ya!

Okay Okay (ya picky bitches), take out the fence, the trees, the other barn, and the rolling field in the background and you’ve got my yard.

Happy?

Anyhoo….because Virginia’s disclosure laws are a  j o k e, not one of the half dozen professionals involved in buying real estate, not to mention the previous owner, felt it necessary to inform us that this lot is one of the highest impacted lots in the neighborhood, rendering our little slice of Eden…all but USELESS.

Why?

There is a 60′ (yes, that is SIXTY) gas company easement from the back of the property towards the house and runs the entire width of the tad over a 1/3 acre lot.  From our way of thinking, that should have been mentioned by SOMEONE in the 2 month buying/closing process yeah?

Yeah……….No!

Add to that 60′ another 20′ for the build line which runs from the structure towards the back of the yard, making the total depth/width of what we cannot add to, plant on, or change in a way that would impede….a whopping 80′.

EIGHTY #$#$%#$ FEET  😖 😭 😕

Even though the gas company could work with us on a fee based waiver, they won’t.

But Wait!  There’s More  (oh goody)

There are also easements from the county that cannot be waivered.

One is a 16′ drainage easement, running back to front, the entire length of the property, but it’s on the side property line, so we didn’t give that one much thought.  At the time.  Not until we had to.  And we had to when we wanted to put a storage shed out there.  On the side.  Away from the gas easement.  Ya know, close to the garage and stuff.

Ummmm….Not gonna happen  🚫

Then {and I chuckle here} there is that all too common, everybody else must have one…FLOOD DAM FAULT LINE!  OR FAULT DAM FLOOD LINE!  OR DAM FLOOD FAULT LINE!  OR SOME DAMNED LINE GOING DIAGONALLY THROUGH THE ENTIRE BACK YARD!!

You got one, right?  And you?  And you, and you?  And you over there?  Everybody?  ‘Cause I’m thinking it’s so damned prolific as to be down right common-place.  Like we all got grass so why point out the grass?  Ain’t that why I’ve never heard of this effin’ thing?  Ain’t it?

What the hell is happening?????????????  😱

The only friggin floods that I have ever heard of around here….were inside my damned house and that fault line didn’t help one daggone bit!!  (el squat-o)

Did I say this made me chuckle?

I lied  😫

Of course, we wouldn’t do it if we didn’t think we’d get a decent enough return to buy another.  The market is good right now, the rates are still low, people may be looking to get into a place before the next school year….all good things right?

So I ask you…

🎶 Should we stay or should we go 🎶

(sorry, I can’t help singing it…lol)

Oh geez…after all that, I forgot to mention why I even began this post.  While we muse over the possibility of listing (we’re about 98% there to be honest), we figured we’d do what we always do in this situation…invest more blood, sweat, and tears, not to mention 💰, into getting our imperfect 🏠 perfect so the next 👸 of the newly perfected 🏰 won’t have to lift a friggin’ finger or spend an effn’ dime!

‘Cause that’s how we role…we Hernandezeseses (Hernadezi?)

We buy, we fix, we do……..and we move.  So we can then…buy old and broken, fix to new and pretty, sell to others who don’t have to do a damned thing…just so we can buy old and broken, fix to new and pretty….blah de blah de blah!

In that vein…
We have had the fireplace that hasn’t worked since the day after we moved in, fixed.
We had the Jacuzzi tub’s leaky-ass faucets that we haven’t touched since the first time we went to use it and didn’t because it leaked, repaired.
We’re giving our wood floors a facelift so they don’t offend the next matriarch with their little Sadie scratches.
We’re resurfacing our pinkish, post-form, laminate countertops that somehow were good enough for me, but certainly will put off today’s savvy buyers looking for the trendier granite because ‘It’s so shiiiiny’.

And I’ve saved the best for last…

and the hardest for me…

the die-hard DIY’er:

Hiring someone to do what I do, and do well is tough. But time, old shoulders, bad, up close & personal, eyesight, added to my increased lack o’ patience, has dictated that this time around…we must bite the proverbial and hire a pro.

You all know me and my history with hiring professionals.

Though you know I pride myself in doing my due diligence, you also know it has gotten my leg broken, my house flooded, my toothbrush packed with the toilet brush, and my car dying at 70 MPH on Interstate 91 in New Haven.

Shall we agree that you know this Wonder Woman of Wacky Workmen?

Okay then…we’re off.

We hired a ‘Pro” to paint the interior of our 4BR, 3BA home, top to bottom, head to toe, and everything in between.  The references were stellar. The estimate reasonable. The time frame – 7 days. Perfect.

That should have been my first clue!

When. Will. I. Learn?

Nothing is perfect, nor apparently, what it seems!

I’m getting ahead of myself…let’s see.  To be pro-active, we removed all wall décor, switch plates, outlet covers, electronics, all items in/on/around furniture, packed everything in boxes, moved all furniture to middle of rooms to be covered, placed all non-necessary furnishings, boxes, small items, etc., in the garage, took up all rugs, and basically had the house ‘paint-ready’ for the start date.  Oh, and we moved into my mother’s to give them free reign to only have to cover stuff once and not worry about finishing one room at a time.  The house was theirs.  They had to do nothing but cover, patch, sand, and paint.

Two painters began on Monday the 6th.  The owner’s son who is taking over the business, and his side kick with 25 years under his belt, cut-in and first coat, guy.

Come Saturday, the 11th, one was left and the other one gone.  I fired the side-kick for lack of production and sloppy work.  His smoke breaks alone used half his hours and all of his work needed to be re-done.

He blamed the paint.  I blamed the painter.  I win.

Boom!  You’re outta here! 

I was told he would be replaced with a more professional side kick, but as of today, the 17th, there is still but one.

Mr Painter Man

Who I call IMA

IMA fix it – IMA gonna do it – IMA be here late tomorra – IMA sorry – IMA IMA IMA

By end of business today, there will have been a total of 11 painting days.

Know what’s done?  Hah…stop that laughing.  Wanna know?

Upstairs.

This is still my downstairs…11 days later

Know what else?

There are 3 walls upstairs that need to be redone.  But I told IMA to save that for dessert cause I needed his ass downstairs in the kitchen!  I’ve got a counter top being redone on MONDAY!!

I even returned the remaining 6 gallons of my accent color, a beautiful Crushed Oregano green, for IMA because he keeps blaming the paint…I changed my design for him!

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Does this color scare you?  It’s on my front door, which I painted, without trouble

 What the hell is wrong with me???  IMA STUPID!

Know what I’m doing right now?

😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 etc etc etc

Why bother going through all of this some might ask.  Especially when my house always looks good whether trendy or not.  Always up to date, clean, and comfy.  Homey!

Because Lord knows, today’s modern and discerning buyer would no doubt, walk into a home with red in the kitchen and yellow in the living room; green in the bathroom and a cloud painted blue sky ceiling in the bonus room, would run screaming into the street for the horror!

None of which I put on the walls but was perfectly fine with it until the day I decided to change it.

Boy oh Boy…we can’t expect someone else to think that way now can we?

Or so the real estate professionals tell me. After all, this is only the 6th house we will have sold, so how would I know anything about what sells and what doesn’t?

So…next week, it’ll be Mr. Painter-man who best have my kitchen done by tomorrow (or else ) and the counter-top crew.  That, should be an interesting day  😂

🎶 🎶 We Should’a Stayed and Let Him Go 🎶 🎶

 

Knock Knock

we tread this earth, green and brown

finite years of life’s countdown

crawl, walk, run, and play

skip, hop, swoon, and sway

egg to fetus to baby, child

adolescence, puberty, then teenage wild

twenties, thirties, forties, more

the time clock ticks but keeps the score

we laugh and cry in joy and sorrow

always thinking there is a tomorrow

killing, dying, violence, abuse

intolerance, slander, what’s the use?

our finite time we waste with hate

malice, gossip, lies that bait

“I am right and you are wrong”

“You don’t matter, move along”

look to the right, look to the left

pick a side or better yet

just put on the blinders; through that tunnel look

where peripheral’s just a word used in books

and open wide; be sure to swallow

what’s left un-sown from minds gone fallow

what’s wrong with us??  we’re going back

to when right was white and wrong was black

to fists and rocks and shoot to kill

our ‘sticks & stones’ now break things at will

when did debate become the place

to harass, harangue, inflame the base?

so trump’s a troll and cruz a liar?

clinton and sanders fantasy cryers?

don’t prove it – just say it – it’s all the same right?

who cares for the truth when what matters is the fight

well I for one am sorry for my nation

we’ll reap what we’re sowing and I fear our creation

we live in a country where anything goes

our music and tv; our poetry and prose

clothing, vehicles, make up, and hair

tattoos and nose rings are everywhere

why is it not for our politics and life choices?

why now are fear and hate the loud voices?

not just of the people, but of those that govern

bottom up to top down, we act like a coven

of witches and bitches and wizards and dicks

if you believe it we’re all screwed, no matter the pick

I’m not naive – nothing I do will matter

I’ll be just as covered in the end with blood spatter

but for me, it’s the end of hate speech

I have my opinions and they’re not there to preach

you do what you want to or have to, for sure

but stop at MY threshold and knock on my door

if I let you in, then I’m saying I’ll listen

I may not agree, but a friend you’ll be christened

up and until or IF you decide

that I need a lesson in choosing sides

do you remember that threshold you crossed?

well head back that way…you’re outta here ol’ hoss!

More or Less is More of Less…only MoreSo

Civilization at the end of 2015

• Our Phones – Wireless
• Cooking – Fireless
• Cars – Keyless
• Food – Fatless
• Tires –Tubeless
• Dress – Sleeveless
• Youth – Jobless
• Leaders – Shameless
• Relationships – Meaningless
• Attitudes – Careless
• Babies – Fatherless
• Feelings – Heartless
• Education – Valueless
• Children – Mannerless
• Country – Godless

We are – SPEECHLESS

Government is – CLUELESS

And our Politicians are – WORTHLESS

I am scared – Shitless!

Ain’t it just – PRICELESS?

old

Brother can you spare some CHANGE?

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

CHANGE

What easier way to showcase change than with the seasons. I’ve been known to take a thousand shots of a single mountain because each shot offers something different. Whether it’s the cloud formations that waft over the top, promising changes to come, or the way the sun strikes it on a sunny day vs. the rays that struggle through to kiss the peak on a cloudier one…IMG_0747One of my favorite changes is the coat of brilliant color that adorns it today when, just yesterday, that coat was green and brown…Jay in the distance

And tomorrow, it’ll be gray as ash, soon to be white as snow…snow cappedThe once empty horizon now filled with the winds of change in the form of wind powered turbines.  All in the name of progress and, for some, the sacrifice of beauty…a change some do not like.IMG_0039
But…there’s more to change than the obvious.  Some is predictable, some inevitable, some wanted, some not.
But it’s always coming. We all know this to be true.
Below, a slideshow with photos and thoughts on what I think about change.
I’m not afraid of it.
Much.
But like it or not…it’s coming.
So I’ll celebrate it here.

Please enjoy and thanks.
FOR A CHANGE….R

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

yabba-D.A.B.D.A.-doo the numbers

The five stages of grief

1.  Denial

2.  Anger

3.  Bargaining

4.  Depression

5.  Acceptance


1

There has been no denial…

…there was no doubt death was coming

2

There has been anger…

…but it’s an exhausting emotion

3

There was a little bargaining…

…too close to self-blaming to be tolerated for long

4

There is depression…

…that ‘happy memory’ thief that sneaks into your heart in the dark

5

There will be acceptance…

…a state of being both wanted and feared at the same time


Remembering the good times, the happy times, is not hard
there are so very many of them

Remembering I am not alone is not easy
until I hear the sadness in the voice on the other end of the phone

Remembering he is gone takes the joy out of the day
until I remember too, how much of him is left within me

Forgetting that he lived and loved and was loved in return is not an option
especially when remembering his legacy to all of us was 

Live like it’s your last day
Love like it’s your last chance
Regret Nothing

Roy E George


Slice of Pie Anyone?

I saw this MEME today…and it got me thinking, actually it got me writing.  I wrote this on a group page I am party to….Politics Vs. Reality, but thought it belonged here as much as there.  This is my mind on white space after all.

These are just my thoughts, opinions, ramblings, whatever. Nothing here is meant to inflame or insult, but I do welcome commentary, which I feel is sadly lacking in our country today, what with all the bashing and name calling, etc. going on.

For me, this is NOT politics, it’s life.

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It has been pointed out…that the facts laid out in this MEME are not true.
That could well be…Ben Stein is a comedian…and I take him with a grain.
However, this MEME only got me thinking…not speaking on the merits of what is stated on it.
Just wanted to make that clear.
🙂

I have thought about it, as many have, and voiced my opinion to those that supposedly represent me (Eric Cantor), to no avail.  It matters not what We The People want…and hasn’t for a very long time.  Left, right, or in the middle…it all comes down to the same ol’ shit…money, power, and politics.
*
There are some who believe what we have is better than anywhere else in the world.  If so, then why are we trying so hard to be like everyone else? Why is it so important NOT to stand up and stand out? The freedoms we have as Americans have always been the most identifiable part of BEING an American.  The whole reason those coming here, COME HERE!
*
I am not ready, nor willing, to hand my freedom card in just yet…I find I still want a say in what happens to, and in, my country.  Folks who believe conservatives, Republicans, right-wingers, tea-baggers as they are so lovingly dubbed, are racist, poor hating, money-grubbing, anti-this, and anti-that…couldn’t be more wrong.  Why the name calling and hating of everyday folks, whose goal is to live by the Constitution?  People who would like to see laws of the land enforced and not circumvented for some and ignored for others?  People who would willingly give everything we have to those that need it, as long as it can be PAID FOR?
*
I know that when a conservative talks about money, the hackles rise on some…but that doesn’t change the facts.  The government needs it, so it takes it.  As we are in the middle of tax season…how many of you that have done yours, have seen in black and white, on one page, just how much more of your money is gone?  It would be fine if we could see the benefits being rained down, but do you?  I don’t.  We are so far down the rabbit hole and falling farther and farther every second, we’ll never see daylight at this rate.
*
To say the government has the right to take it, without asking for it, is wrong!  The fact that they do it, even more so.  We used to have a say, through our House of Representatives, how and how much.  When did we vote to give up that right? Ummm, never.
*
We continually throw good money after bad.  Good intentioned?  Sure…no one deserves to be left in the dark hole of poverty, scrounging for the very basic needs of life…NO ONE…and it’s the best part of our country and its citizens to want to do something about that…and we can…but currently we are dancing around the real issues…one step forward, two steps back…we need some tough love here.  And yes, I’m talking about immigration, as it’s where we started and if we are not careful, it’s where we will end!
*
I am well versed in the laws of immigration.  I am 32 years into a marriage to one.  And along with his family and the multitudes I’ve met through them, and several of my own immediate family members who work directly with/for immigrants, we DO have a good system in place.  So where did it go so wrong?  I’ll leave that to you to answer because I don’t know, can only speculate, that money, power, and politics have something to do with it.
*
We are a nation of immigrants.  To think we could, or should, survive without the influence and diversity these folks bring to our culture is ignorant and very short-sighted.  BUT, we must do something about HOW they come in…not why, not who, but HOW.  We have the law, let’s use it. If we need more staff, let’s hire them to get the log jam of those waiting undammed.
*
We cannot fix this overnight.  We’ve wasted too much time and too much money already, doing things behind the guise of humanitarianism, while at the same time, adding more and more blocks of concrete on the heads of those in that hole.  The hole is getting deeper and filling faster and throwing money we do not have at this is not going to empty it out.
*
It is not racist, or hate mongering, or elitist, to want our immigration laws enforced.  It is not any of those things to want our country solvent enough to care for our own AS WELL as those who chose to make lives for themselves here.  It IS wrong to condemn people who believe we should follow the law, live within our means, and/or live by the Constitution.  Just as it is also wrong, to conversely, label those that feel we must change those laws or amend that same Constitution…it works both ways.
But anyway you look at it, any way you lean, any way you slice this good, old-fashioned, American Apple Pie…we are out of pie.
*
Before we can invite/welcome/help anyone looking for their slice…we must first, bake a better, more sustaining, pie.  And we can’t do that robbing our future bakers nor by forgetting the most important ingredients…American ingenuity and common sense.  Let’s find a way, or better use what’s in our larder, to do this before we invite the rest of the world over for coffee and dessert.  Can we do that?
*
(the opinions expressed here are just that, opinions, and they happen to be mine)

*

If you want it, the link below offers some food thought, and it IS worth thinking about:

http://youtu.be/LPjzfGChGlE

One Day

By dinner time tomorrow, our soggy, box-full, furniture-empty, house will feel like home despite it all.

IMG_0024

He leaves the deep freeze on the shores of the Arctic Ocean tonight and will arrive on the unusually frozen southern shores of the Atlantic tomorrow.  Knowing he had not planned on bringing his arctic gear, an emergency phone call took care of that.  True winter in the lower 48 awaits his arrival.  He doesn’t mind though, winter is kind of his thing…

matt2

We’ve not seen him for over a year, Christmas 2012 to be exact. So much has happened in his life and ours since then, I’m not sure his two weeks will be enough time to sort it all out.  And sort it out we must, for as much excitement as there is in his return, it wears the shroud of sadness that only a broken heart wears.

You see, he fell in love with a dog, who owned the girl, that stole our son’s heart…

tandum

He chose the ring for the knot that means a great deal to her and announced to the world “SHE SAID YES!” on July 20th…

the ring

She chose the dress in the color that says “I am not afraid as I face the world with the man I love

the dress

They chose the date, Friday, February 13, 2015, to tell the world “We have no fear of your superstitions, we’ll face it together

They spent every spare moment they had together, traveling the land they both love so much…

matts land

One of the hardest things to witness is the breaking of your child’s heart.  Whether 2 or 25, the heart cares not the why or the how, only that it’s a pain unlike any other.

The life plan has changed. The love won, now lost. “She said yes!” echoes hollowly in the darkness following “I’ve changed my mind, I don’t want to be with anyone”

As his mother, I grieve for his tender heart and shattered dreams.

As his mother I silently thank the girl for knowing this truth now and being brave enough to say so.

As his mother, I weep for and with him, longing to make it better, but knowing I can offer nothing but a safe place for him to cry.

So, it’s time for this boy, this man, our Matthew, to come home to slide into the open arms of his Dad and me; the only place he can let it all go.

The place where the man can again be the boy who needs what only his family can give him…a safe place to grieve, a hearth to warm the bone deep chill of lost love, and the touch of those that know the truest nature of him…love.  He shines with it and has since he was born.

He will find The One.

Someday.

One who will see him for who he is, and love him completely for it.

We know this.

He will too.

One Day.

Until then, we’ll do what we have always done…love him, guide him beyond his feeling foolish for having loved “too much”.  With the gentlest of reminders that no love is ever foolish or ever wasted or ever “too much”. That to deny the best part of himself for fear of being hurt this way again, would be to deny the very air he breathes.

He won’t.  He can’t.  It’s not in him.

As his mother, this I know.

Welcome Home Matthew…where the heart is

matt1matt 3

“As the Shade Spins” A tra-com-edy of dysfunction and disillusion

once upon a time

long ago and far far away, in the beginning of a dark and stormy night, it was love at first sight…then shit REALLY got interesting!

2014
The new year’s babe came roaring into existence
dragging what was left of her meaner older brother
2013
by the roots of his dead gray short hairs

I had hoped to see the end of The Year That Almost Totally Sucked Ass (T.Y.T.A.T.S.A.) around the same time I saw Massachusetts in the rear view mirror

Seems Ol’ 13 had other ideas.
Seems Ol’ 13 wasn’t quite ready to belt out Auld Lang Syne
And it’s obvious good Ol’ 13 conned his newborn kid sister into taking him along to continue the never-ending days of madness and mayhem

No way was he going out like a lamb
If he was anything at all, he was a wolf in sheep’s clothing
And determined to stick around for the final act he called

 “Wanna see the crazy old crow lose her mind?”

IMG_0007 (3)

WHAT’S HAPPENING?
(shades of poltergeist…at the 2.08 mark to be exact!)

My enthusiastic and optimistic return to enthusiastic and optimistic blogging in March of T.Y.T.A.T.S.A., has not gone quite as I had planned.  Then again, how does one plan life anyway.

I won’t recount the entire war, as I have already shared a few of the bloodier battles here already.

Those days were the “Once Upon a Time” and “In the Beginning” days.

And, I’ll leave it to you to decide whether to visit the “”Long Ago and Far Far Away” tales and wade through those deep and scoured trenches.

For now, if you choose, a quick peak at what optimism looks like (On the Road Again), then maybe a bit of “Love at First Sight“…

For soon, we’ll pick up where the shit REALLY gets interesting!”

Somewhere between Moving Day and Moving Day II

The can of worms is in the pan and on the stove, so join me for dinner and a show…

Next time on “As The Shade Spins

😳

Moving Day

It’s finally here.
The big day.

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Wake Up!

Two weeks to find it.

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Home Sweet Home

Two weeks to haggle, inspect, haggle some more, fix, and sign on the dotted line.

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Leaving behind the bright lights of northern Vermont

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Come on men...we have a new kitchen to set up...

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Wait for me you Oinkers!

Nothing to do now but wait for the professionals who’ll pack whatever is not nailed down…

image

Just in time for the holiday…

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Like we don't have enough to do?

So here we go…time to move

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Next stop…
H O M E!!

See ya’ll real soon.
🙂

(PS) this is from my phone…can’t really see it…hope it came through as intended.