I spy with my beady eyes something on the beach
But what I spy I cannot lie is not something to eat!
What is this crap you’ve left behind on this beach I come for dinner?
If I did that to you humans FAT you’d soon be a whole lot thinner!
Nasty things…
… you human beings
Yeah I said that out loud
You’re selfish leeches, who ruin our beaches, instead of feeling proud!
Now I spy with my beady eyes something that belongs
And if in fact it’s still intact I’ll eat it all day long
And when it’s gone I’ll move along and leave my trash behind
The difference being what you are seeing is what you want to find!
So HU-MAN next time you pan my table for your treasure
Just bear in mind that trash you find brings years of joy and pleasure!
As a guest you are a pest and if you keep this up
I will fly high in the sky and aim right for your cup!
So be like me and leave the sea and beaches free of litter
For if not I’ll take my shot…
…and trust me I don’t shit glitter!
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50 Shades of Gray Hair 
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