Groundhogs and Superbowls and Taxes…Oh My

2.2.2014

Groundhog Day

The hog…did he see it?  Do you believe?  Do you even care?

The movie…did you see it?

I shutter at the thought, but then again, after recent events…it’s a tad too close for comfort as far as I’m concerned!

Has anyone bothered asking the all-knowing fat and furry faux forecaster about global warming?

Just curious

Superbowl Sunday

Gonna watch it? Do you even care?

If you don’t follow the pigskin or if your favorite team’s not in the show…does it still make a sound in the football forest when helmets collide with the goalpost?

Just curious

Taxes

Have you done them?

Have you even started thinking about them?

Are you moaning now that you’ve been reminded?

As I gear up to dig out and jump in or dig in and jump out…I decided I needed a little light reading first, and since we are all in this together, I thought maybe you could use a little bit too.

So, after a foray into my email funnies vault…I pulled out one that celebrates the reason for the season…or…days like today.

The Human Male.

WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:

Men Are Just Happier People
What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack…
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them.
New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.  
One mood all the time.  
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you,
He or she can still be your friend.  
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough..
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes..
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, even decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.  
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can ‘do’ your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.  
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
   ___________________________________
Men Are Just Happier People
   ________________________________
And now, a final thought before I dive into hours of mind-numbing mathematical mayhem:
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

{How a mind that rambled around the page like I did on this post, can even remotely think this is the right day to begin her taxes, is beyond me}

21 thoughts on “Groundhogs and Superbowls and Taxes…Oh My

  1. Pingback: How to Love the Super Bowl XLVIII | Misifusa's Blog

    • I’ve been dreading this year sfam…job hunting, selling a house, buying a house, moving, starting a new job…plus medical expenses w/o insurance (even so, won’t amount to a hill of beans as far as the gov’t goes)…should be fun! Refilling my glass as we speak…I’m off to the races!

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      • she’s been around NB…just not here so much. but won’t be surprised if something nudges her soon…she can’t go TOO long without making poetry outta cat poop, if you know what I mean!

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  2. Thank you for the belly-roaring laughter! Love that list. And the ‘final thought’ on the differences between the sexes. Oh and thanks for the glimpse into the nuances of various sides of Rhonda. 😉 Humor AND taxes? Brave woman!

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