T’was the Year Before This One
T’was the year before this one, exactly this day
They had dealings with elves Satan had sent their way
Cleverly disguised as movers, those elves
Had completely and thoroughly, distinguished themselves
As minions of evil, true thugs, nincompoops
Whose Coup de Grace was an utter Grace de Poop
Pa on the phone with Satan’s head guy
Ma was outside screaming her battle cry
When all of a sudden, there rose such a clatter
Pa sprung from the house to see what’s the matter
He saw flashes of fire coming out of her eyes
And heard “I. Am. Leaving. Before someone DIES“
Little did she know that was only the beginning
Of the Battle O’ the Bunglers (Satan ended up winning)
But through all the breakage of glass, wood, and legs
They stopped trying to fill their round hole with square pegs
Try though they did, there was no talking to Boss Putz
They had no control over Dumb, Dumber, and Numb NutZ
So they did what they could to get through that last year
Now damn it all, damn it all, there’ll be Christmas this year!
What a difference a year makes!
50 Shades of Gray Hair 
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